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July 13, 2008

Few Thoughts

I posted this on BT LL, and liked it so I'm posting it on my blogs.

"One thing keeps coming back to me. As I lay at the bottom of the cliff, in the creek, the first thing I did was check my jaw/teeth/face, and wiggle my toes. But my mind was thinking, "You silly goose, all that music you play by yourself, and if you were dead now nobody would know. They would never have heard it." Only it wasn't silly goose it was more like shy, stupid woman.

And then the other night I realized I have spent the entire 21st century without playing out except for little pick up gigs with my brothers. I got sidetracked into the whole kayaking thing, which I'm not very good at but it is fun.

I have had a lot to think about. Like, what is important. Or, if I'd died, how I would be remembered, and what for, and what good things have I bothered to do while alive? I really was afraid I wouldn't play again because of my loss of feeling in my fingers. I can type with this hand again though, and I believe it will all come back. I have faith it will come back.

No I'm not God's Gift To Music, but it really does make me happy like nothing else."

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